
The Existential Moment: Love
Existential Humanistic Therapy is relational and experiential. What is the role of love in therapy and in the therapeutic relationship?
Existential Humanistic Therapy is relational and experiential. What is the role of love in therapy and in the therapeutic relationship?
Reflection is a bit like the work of the Spirits of Christmas Past, Present, and Yet to Come. We mirror or reflect our client’s experience—the content presented, the process or experience in the moment (e.g., nonverbals, tone, pattern of speech, etc.), self and world constructs (e.g., “I am…”), protective patterns and inner tensions, and core vulnerabilities or wounds.
E-H Therapy is experiential and relational. The approach leverages several “micro-skills “to develop experience in the room, including tagging, slowing down and tuning in, reflecting back, etc. Each works to deepen presence “here-and-now.”
One skill is “bringing there-and-then into here-and-now.” It looks like, for example, the therapist’s statement above, “How does that feel to say?” The client narrated a story “there-and-then.” However, the realization of PTSD occurred in the present moment, suggesting a critical path to explore. Working in the present offers tremendous therapeutic potential. While nothing is wrong with narrating, experiencing offers immense possibilities for growth.
Can we be present with it? It’s beyond difficult. The news and social media teem with stories of the Israel-Hamas War. Parents talking about the horrific murder of their children or burning of their families
Authenticity is a core concept of existential philosophy and an essential touchstone in E-H therapy. Moral connotation (i.e., socio-political ideal) aside, authenticity means congruence with oneself – who we really are. It stands opposite ideas like “bad faith” or “alienation.”
Clients often grapple with societal pressures, parental expectations, an oppressive conscience, self-deceptions, internal conflicts, past traumas, etc., that deter them from seeing and living their authentic path.
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